"Thoughts untwined, spilled so graciously on that tree"
From a young age, I've always loved to write. Writing in journals, writing stories, making to-do lists, keeping track of my food intake, writing scripts for school projects...anything and everything written appeals to me (except Ann Coulter...that bitch is crazy). I find writing to be fun and a challenge at the same time. Playing with words to make them provoke a certain emotion or produce a clear image is really hard to do, and is something that I've been working on for a long time. So I guess I would say that my next goal:
That's all gravy, except there's a problem. This might sound crazy, but it's true. I've lost my voice. Well, my writing voice. I had a certain way of writing that I really liked a lot, but it's gone. Where did it go?
wha? Here's all I can come up with: as from my previous post, you know that I love learning new languages. I spent however many years learning French, and I finally got the chance to go to France and test it out so of course I went. Up until then, I wrote often and never had a problem with my style/voice. It seems that my language immersion while studying in Angers completely messed up the way I say things, and in turn write them. While I was there, I remember calling home to my mom and barely being able to speak in full sentences because all I heard was French all day. And even after coming home sometimes a little Franglish comes out. Constructing meaningful and worthwhile sentences is also pretty hard at times. If I want to say something like, "Then the lonely man and the desparate woman passionately embraced" (not that I would EVER write that for reals), my French mind tells me to switch the adjectives after the subjects change the end to "embrassé avec passion". NO NO NO! Why do I do this? Why can't I create beautiful and well-constructed thoughts??? Boo.
I do have another problem: I am too critical of myself. I will be writing a story and along the way I am cursing myself for poor grammar, poor vocabulary and my severe attachment to commas. I love commas. They are necessary. But, really, are they that necessary? See what I mean? I have to stop. That is one of many flaws I see in my writing. BUT, I like to write to write so I am aiming to JUST WRITE. Just let my Franglish flow and see how far it gets me.
What I am working on now:
*A screenplay
*A memoir about my adventures in Europe (aptly titled "L'Eau de Broccoli Farts")
*A chick lit that I can't get anywhere with because I gag everytime I think about the level I am stooping to
Ideas I have in my head for the future:
*Several documentaries
*More screenplays
*A short story book
With so many ideas floating around in my head, it's really hard to focus on just one project and see it to completion. I get an idea for book A, so I work on that for a week before I jump to my screenplay for a month before I have an entirely new idea I want to explore. Again, boo.
LUCKILY, I've made deadlines for myself. By September I want to have my screenplay written, edited and ready to present to the public. My friend Meagan is keeping me in check with that one, because she is in the process of writing a cookbook that she wants to have done at the same time. We are going to have a "release" party at the end of September, even though my screenplay surely won't have made it past my desk.
In addition to a looming deadline, I have set up a weekly writing session with my friend Ashley. She has a passion for writing like I do, so every Tuesday (today!) we go to a different coffeeshop around Portland and write as much as we can before my Russian class. Often times more talking happens than writing, but that's okay with me - she's a good conversationalist!
So how do I keep myself in check with this blog? Especially when I am too scared to share what I'm writing? I don't know. Ideas?
Goal #4 Be a writer
(on the side? as my primary occupation? dunno.)
That's all gravy, except there's a problem. This might sound crazy, but it's true. I've lost my voice. Well, my writing voice. I had a certain way of writing that I really liked a lot, but it's gone. Where did it go?
I think I left my voice in France.
wha? Here's all I can come up with: as from my previous post, you know that I love learning new languages. I spent however many years learning French, and I finally got the chance to go to France and test it out so of course I went. Up until then, I wrote often and never had a problem with my style/voice. It seems that my language immersion while studying in Angers completely messed up the way I say things, and in turn write them. While I was there, I remember calling home to my mom and barely being able to speak in full sentences because all I heard was French all day. And even after coming home sometimes a little Franglish comes out. Constructing meaningful and worthwhile sentences is also pretty hard at times. If I want to say something like, "Then the lonely man and the desparate woman passionately embraced" (not that I would EVER write that for reals), my French mind tells me to switch the adjectives after the subjects change the end to "embrassé avec passion". NO NO NO! Why do I do this? Why can't I create beautiful and well-constructed thoughts??? Boo.
I do have another problem: I am too critical of myself. I will be writing a story and along the way I am cursing myself for poor grammar, poor vocabulary and my severe attachment to commas. I love commas. They are necessary. But, really, are they that necessary? See what I mean? I have to stop. That is one of many flaws I see in my writing. BUT, I like to write to write so I am aiming to JUST WRITE. Just let my Franglish flow and see how far it gets me.
What I am working on now:
*A screenplay
*A memoir about my adventures in Europe (aptly titled "L'Eau de Broccoli Farts")
*A chick lit that I can't get anywhere with because I gag everytime I think about the level I am stooping to
Ideas I have in my head for the future:
*Several documentaries
*More screenplays
*A short story book
With so many ideas floating around in my head, it's really hard to focus on just one project and see it to completion. I get an idea for book A, so I work on that for a week before I jump to my screenplay for a month before I have an entirely new idea I want to explore. Again, boo.
LUCKILY, I've made deadlines for myself. By September I want to have my screenplay written, edited and ready to present to the public. My friend Meagan is keeping me in check with that one, because she is in the process of writing a cookbook that she wants to have done at the same time. We are going to have a "release" party at the end of September, even though my screenplay surely won't have made it past my desk.
In addition to a looming deadline, I have set up a weekly writing session with my friend Ashley. She has a passion for writing like I do, so every Tuesday (today!) we go to a different coffeeshop around Portland and write as much as we can before my Russian class. Often times more talking happens than writing, but that's okay with me - she's a good conversationalist!
So how do I keep myself in check with this blog? Especially when I am too scared to share what I'm writing? I don't know. Ideas?




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